| May 16, 1987 |
[21 Oct 2009|08:57pm] |
Spectral Moon day 15 Year of the Red Resonant Moon
kin 223: Blue Lunar Night I Polarize in order to Dream Stabilizing Intuition I seal the Input of Abundance With the Lunar tone of Challenge I am guided by the power of Vision
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[17 May 2009|01:08am] |
Funny, how the day i turn 22 is the day that I decied to become sober. I havent been happy in a long time, and i can bet that my recent drunken assholeish stints prob havent helped. wow. I dont even know how this is going to work. but I guess on the bright side, I at least recognize that i might have a problem. and must stop. i can do this. i can do this.
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[13 May 2009|12:38am] |
fact: the reason why i dont want to plan a birthday party is beacuse i know that no one will come.
but thanks audie for saying it outloud and making me feel like shit
fact: for people that i care so much about, they sure dont seem to give a shit about me
fact: i am crying and no one notices. i bet if they ever read this they'd prob laugh.
4 years later and i still cant make real friend. i must be all kinds of messed up jajja
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| This is what I have been doing wrong |
[29 Apr 2009|12:07am] |
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mood |
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determined |
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Then he understood. He thought, this is how men feel, trapped in a shell hole...
"Now," he said, "talk. Talk about the things you really want said. Don't tell me about your family, your childhood, your friends or your feelings. Tell me about the things you think." Mallory looked at him and whispered; "How did you know what's been killing me? Slowly for years, driving me to hate people when I don't want to hate... Have you ever seen your best friend love everything about you- except the things that count? And your most important is nothing to them, not even a sound they can recognize. you mean you want to hear? You want to know what I do and why I do it, you want to know what I think?Its not boring to you? It's important?" "Go ahead," said Roark Then he sat listening while Mallory spoke of his work, of the thoughts behind his work, of the thoughts that shaped his life spoke gluttonously, like a drowning man flung out to shore, getting drunk on huge, clean snatches of air"
The Fountainhead
this is it!
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[01 Mar 2009|07:37pm] |
the worst part of realizing that your friends are talking behind your back is trusting them again. especially when they have done it more then once.
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| The English Patient, Michael Ondaatje |
[29 Jan 2009|07:32pm] |
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A postcard. Neat handwriting fills the rectangle. Half my days I cannot bear to touch you. The rest of the time I feel it doesn't matter if I ever see you again. It isn't the mortality, it is how much you can bear.
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[02 Dec 2008|11:58pm] |
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that was hard.
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[05 Nov 2008|01:48am] |
FUCK YES OBAMA.
good bye corruption, good bye dispair :D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D!!!!! this is what hope feels like everyone. I hope it spread all around the world, we cna do this!!!
oh and fuck you sulky young republican. I;m sorry that Daddy promised you a new pony if mccain won and now you wont get it. fuck you, for choosing your MONEY over human lives, and basic morals. may you enjoy the next 4 (HOPEFULLY 8) years and may you learn what a REAL leader IS: one who cares about people. :D :D :D :D
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[03 Nov 2008|12:01am] |
- i am so addicted to ontd_twatlight. - got an A in mo bio. i kick ass - lost my computrer to best buy - got lent a new comp - dazzled leah into reading twilight - had a great hallowen.
:) how about everyone else
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[15 Sep 2008|01:42am] |
today instead of studying for my french hw i:
- caught up on all of my FF reading - joined ONTD_twatlight community on lj - saw 7 chapters of Rebelde - bonded with my roomies
i love my life. even if i hate french with a burning passion jajaja
loves all
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| -_- hate bieng cold |
[02 Aug 2008|02:15pm] |
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mood |
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amused |
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so i wrote this long emo entry, buuutttt then i realized that it was to long and annoying so i decided to make a list instead. it shall be things that suck and things that dont jajaja.
so thats really it. all in all, lifes not bad at all. jajajaja. I guess I am just too content to really BE writing an emo entry anyways jajaja.
loves hugs everyone!!
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[27 Mar 2008|01:20am] |
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mood |
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amused |
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music |
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Joseph Arthur: In the Sun |
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so we grow up
its intersting if you think about it, beacuse we change but you dont really realize it. then one day you wake up. you realize that you dont mind your weight, that you did your homework and read ahead. and holy shit. you;re a grown up
i hope that never happens to me.
jajaja hence the lj post as i procrastinate studyning for my genetics test. i like someone new. and its strange and wonderful and kinda sad all at the same time. i worry i am going to talk about him all the time and people are going to want to smack me in the face like last time. there are butterflies.
sometimes i look back and it really is like a hazy dream. and thats so sad. but i think its needed. we cant change the past. things change. but then again. friends stay constant. and you realize that sometimes friendships dont make it not just beacuse of you. i like this whole new thing of not blaming myself for everything thing. its really nice. its been a good day. i hope i get more. i hope things work out my way i hope; i hop. we all need a little something
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| procrastinating |
[27 Jan 2008|10:29pm] |
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mood |
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cheerful |
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music |
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techno |
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today i realized lots of things and grew up as a person
... i also wasted a lot of time reading FF and watching Ugly Betty. best show ever oh and browsing on facebook. which is the whole point of todays post. Insperational bumper stickers i found on facebook jajajja, KIDDING!!! but you know i have been bitching all this time about my lack of true friends when i realize thats not true at all. i have great friends. ppl who check up on me when i am sick, and who call when i sound a little sad. send me an email just to make sure i am better. i mean its more then what most ppl can say. :)
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[03 Dec 2007|12:14am] |
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music |
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Sondre Lerche: After All |
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in a blant disregard to my new motto "Not everything is a personal attack"
... a little acknowledgement would be nice. you know. or just say a big fuck you to my face too. anything works, i am not picky. thanks for embracing and respecting our friendship guys. I hope living together next year works out better then me.
bullocks. its cold everywhere.
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[02 Nov 2007|09:25pm] |
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mood |
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bouncy |
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music |
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Teeth In the Grass: Iron and Wine |
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jaja i have a legit bipolar issue
yesterday? not so good
today my coffee smiled at me, they played my favourite song in Espresso and arond 8:05 pm i understood and got right my first physics problem. i also took the most amazing nap in the entire world. sometimes its the beating that life gives us which makes us stronger. either that or the smiley face that the barista drew in my latte. which made my day. along with him going alll the way to the back room to find the last pumpkin muffin. :) yay
oh and i got sent a video frommy mum about keping my chin up. only it compared my life to the life of midgets. midgets creep me out. that was an uncool video jajajaa. ahh midgets jajaja
(thank youuuuuuuuuuuu... you know whos jajaja) loves loves
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| in-un-derstandable |
[24 Oct 2007|01:18am] |
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mood |
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content |
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music |
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Joe Purdy: I Miss the Rain the Most |
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i love reminders of life.
like little things, the sound of a song, that just touches you in the right way the sound of your real laughter, a good moment with people you like a reminder of how much you really and truely love people. sometimes i forget. i just forget. the important things, the small things. a kiss on top of someones head, a re-affirmation. this makes no sense, but itsok.jajaja friends of mine, you are my family. jajajaja, i love this feeling, where your heart feels so full and all you want to do is sing and dance and.... its like being filled with this elation and this lightness. i did things today i havent done in a while. mmmm, i am filled with content. :) i feel a list can do justice.
- iron and wine - small orphen children that I want to adopt. - "Some days her shape in the doorway Will speak to me" - Singing Frog do not make for good minions - But i have a large head, and little arms!!!
no i was wrong. lists wont work. i fear only song lyrics can eally convey what i feel, and those never really...work. jajajaja but fear not. loves loves
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[05 Oct 2007|02:19am] |
i want i want i want i want i want i want i want
i want
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[30 Sep 2007|09:42pm] |
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mood |
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curious |
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music |
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The Beatles: I Want You (She's So Heavy) |
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oh wow
see? people will always hurt people. its like our job, this innate need. bah humbug.
i am on a serious beatles and iron and wine binge. woot!
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